Wednesday, 29 June 2011

Chat to us on Twitter about gay and lesbian adoption

Last night we invited all those out there who are experienced in - or seeking advice about - gay and lesbian adoption to join us and the guys at New Family Social for a live Twitter Chat.

All those who took part tagged their tweets with #adoptfosterchat - read on below for a transcript of the event (most recent tweets appear first).


sueatkins
RT @AdoptResources: Check @BAAFAdoption blog tomorrow http://bit.ly/977pnx for a round-up of tonight's #adoptfosterchat

raygumbley
RT @Lauzthegeek: @iamsocialwork check out the #adoptfosterchat!

gayadoptionuk
RT @Tillymint2u: #adoptfosterchat goodnight from me, good luck to everyone about to embark on the journey, thanks to adoption we have an amazing family :)

GoodnightBot
RT @Tillymint2u #adoptfosterchat goodnight from me, good luck to everyone about to embark on the journey, thanks... http://bit.ly/kbJ3pr

Tillymint2u
#adoptfosterchat goodnight from me, good luck to everyone about to embark on the journey, thanks to adoption we have an amazing family :)

gayadoptionuk
RT @Lawsey1974: I enjoyed taking part in the #adoptfosterchat I never tire talking about adoption. best thing we ever did.

Lawsey1974
I enjoyed taking part in the #adoptfosterchat I never tire talking about adoption. best thing we ever did.

Tillymint2u
@Lawsey1974 Me too #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@LauzTheGeek @Tillymint2u chose LA as felt more supported. Working with expert social workers & family workers #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@LauzTheGeek that's what I meant really, when the LA can't find a family for a child they look to agencies to help. #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@ehayles met kids in April 09 & they moved in after 2 weeks of intros. Training talks about children who need families etc #adoptfosterchat

ehayles
Lol! Have closed my alert about phone battery five times because of all the great advice I want to read! #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
see our selection of books: http://cot.ag/jo0plZ #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
Thanks @BAAFAdoption @gayadoptionuk for #adoptfosterchat Gud luck all those thinkin/goin n gone thru the process. T*

gayadoptionuk
RT @Lauzthegeek: @BAAFAdoption @gayadoptionuk Thanks for a really useful #adoptfosterchat. Hope to see lots more LGBT carers coming forward!

liberalmama
@Theresauno #adoptfosterchat Good idea. I'll look. Thanks!

liberalmama
@BAAFAdoption Thank you!! I've been searching for a children's book. Too advanced for my 3y/o but will help. #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
Blimey, it's gone 8! Thanks to @BAAFAdoption and everyone who joined us. I'll still be around for a bit... #adoptfosterchat

AdoptResources
Check @BAAFAdoption blog tomorrow http://bit.ly/977pnx for a round-up of tonight's #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Theresauno @LauzTheGeek Got blog post u myt b interested in http://t.co/bQGGOrz Good luck T* #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Thanks to all who joined us - especially @gayadoptionuk! #adoptfosterchat

liberalmama
@TorDocherty Cld u share if u ever find any writing on it? Foster training didn't discuss at all. #adoptfosterchat

ehayles
Do you get a lot of Ethnic minority adopters or fosters? Very closed question but just out of interest. #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Right all, it's goodnight from us - please check the blog tomorrow http://bit.ly/977pnx for a round-up of tonight's chat! #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@LauzTheGeek LA's place all children that they can they pass them on to agencies when they become hard to place, true? #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
If you are considering adoption, do join NFS for advice, or give us a call: http://cot.ag/kmrOtQ #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@LauzTheGeek Sorry Laura, think u myt have misunderstood. I am heterosexual bt have fostered kids to a same-sex couple #adoptfosterchat

AdoptResources
"@gayadoptionuk: There is huge positivity in our group-lots of families choosing adoption as a first option-and it shows #adoptfosterchat"

BAAFAdoption
@liberalmama This children's book may help: http://bit.ly/jtCaom #adoptfosterchat

AdoptResources
"@BAAFAdoption: If anyone needs further help, info or advice: http://bit.ly/mFGCam #adoptfosterchat"

gayadoptionuk
There is huge positivity in our group - lots of families choosing adoption as a first option - and it shows #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
More books here: http://bit.ly/kQio2A #adoptfosterchat #gay #lesbian #adoption

Theresauno
@liberalmama Might b sumthin around foster children n bio children avail. Cud b helpful? similar for children 2 cope wiv. #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
If anyone needs further help, info or advice: http://bit.ly/mFGCam #adoptfosterchat

henriettabond
RT @BAAFAdoption: RT @gayadoptionuk: @Lawsey1974 The bad stories are getting fewer&fewer - good experiences r givin social workers confidence #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@Joe_Dow that sounds like a good plan - full day / overnight experience is good if poss. #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@LauzTheGeek L.A. 17yrs..feel like I have a bit of an affinity for them..altho I do wonder why sumtyms! Lol! #adoptfosterchat

ehayles
@Theresauno awww you are right! Hopefully a great match for all of us :-) #adoptfosterchat

AdoptResources
A bit late to the party... Just joining #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@LauzTheGeek our SW is great, we've known her 3 years now and she feels like a friend, always been very easy to talk to #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@Joe_Dow Hard to say a minimum... but it really helps you prepare, and also gives "brownie points" at matching stage #adoptfosterchat

liberalmama
Wondering if anyone has book blog or other suggestions on issue of bio & adopted children in same home.Not finding much. #adoptfosterchat

AdoptResources
RT @BAAFAdoption: Great real-life story in our book store - 'Is it true you have two mums?' http://bit.ly/knOSWs #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Joe_Dow Difficult to be precise - more about what meaningful experience u get that will prepare u for caring for a child #adoptfosterchat

Joe_Dow
#adoptfosterchat just signed up for some voluntary work at a nursery. How many hours/days experience is enough to help with process?

BAAFAdoption
@TorDocherty But exciting too?! #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@LauzTheGeek I'm a foster carer bt thought the s.w., adopters n self all worked really well 2gether for the children.#adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Theresauno: @ehayles I'm sure it will b a roller-coaster ride but with something very precious at the end. #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@ehayles I'm sure it will b a roller-coaster ride but with something very precious at the end. #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@ehayles we were very lucky 1 month to be matched on both occasions, 13 months from 1st enq to meeting No. 1 #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@ehayles Experience of working w/ children will stand u in good stead in application process #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@BAAFAdoption ours are still very young, they'll always know they're adopted but dreading the day of deeper questions #adoptfosterchat

iamsocialwork
RT @Lauzthegeek: @iamsocialwork check out the #adoptfosterchat!

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles Keep your options open - but make sure you do what's right for you. #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles definately talk to other adopters in considering ages, siblings etc. #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@ehayles @ehayles Actually 14 mths is quite quick. That was from 1st phonecall to them moving in #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@ehayles Actually 14 mths is quite quick. It only takes 9 to grow a baby. That was from 1st phonecall to them moving in #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@BAAFAdoption I'm reviewing that book for our LA adoption newsletter, with having a newish arrival I haven't got far at all #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@ehayles I've known adopters who have waited 2 years or more to be matched wiv the right child bt still said very worth it #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@ehayles LAs have obligation to assess for adoption support. Support given will be based on needs of child #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles amongst families in our group 3-5 is prob average - but lots of under 2's and over 6's too #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Great real-life story in our book store - 'Is it true you have two mums?' http://bit.ly/knOSWs #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
have a look at these blogs for more expriences: http://cot.ag/kEVed6 #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@ehayles After age of 9/10 it tends to be more difficult for children to become adopted #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Tillymint2u Glad u had a positive experience with the f.c.s too.It makes it much easier for everyone. #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles 8 months would be for assessment only - matching could be a month... or 2 years or more #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Lawsey1974 Tha's gr8, glad f.c.s were supportive too can b difficult tym for them. I am one..Lol! #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
“@Tillymint2u: @ltwhit I think they hold an extra special place in their hearts, so completely accepted :)” #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@ltwhit Our son is absolutely doted on by grandparents! Even if parents aren't sure at first, they tend to come round. #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@ehayles Cld b 2 yrs to b assessed & have placement but shouldn't take that long for assessment (gov recommends 8 mths) #adoptfosterchat

ltwhit
#adoptfosterchat interested to know people's family reactions. Are the children accepted & loved as grandkids and nieces and nephews etc? :)

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles 14 months is actually quite quick! Between that and 2 years is average #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
I'd agree wiv tht.Adopters of my children have always met bio parents n said it's bin difficult bt worthwhile 4 all. #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@steab84 only indirect letter box contact, we've written to them but haven't received anything back, but didn't expect to #adoptfosterchat

sfakhro
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

BAAFAdoption
@Lawsey1974 Enjoy! #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@baafadoption have to go play football in garden with son. Will answer any tweets when back. #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@steab84 Adopters I know have been pleased to have met birth parents.. helps make connections and good for the children #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@LauzTheGeek SW's shoudn't be afraid of exploring issues around sexuality... http://bit.ly/fw9v7s #adoptfosterchat

steab84
#adoptfosterchat another question from me. Anyone had experience with contact from biological parents? Good or bad? Thanks

BAAFAdoption
@Joe_Dow Usually from when they make first enquiry. Gov may measure from when app lodged w/ agency #adoptfosterchat

CorpDC
RT @BAAFAdoption: RT @Lawsey1974: @lpnolan @BAAFAdoption Process took 13mths total. u go through it like everyone else.We were placed quickly #adoptfosterchat

Joe_Dow
#adoptfosterchat when people say the process took x number of months..what are you counting as the starting point? After the prep group?

Lawsey1974
@ehayles @baafadoption Thanks. A boy 8 and girl 6, been with us 2 1/2 years. They're wonderful. Took 14 months total #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@ehayles I know plenty of adopters in flats - you just need a room to spare! #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@BAAFAdoption @gayadoptionuk We're in Manchester & used Salford LA, they have v high number of LGBT adopters I think #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
You are welcome to join our 450 LGBT families & families-to-be who share advice & experience: http://cot.ag/lgeVX4 #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@ehayles You won't be ruled out for living in a flat - make contact & start the process :) #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@Lawsey1974 we are LA, they were great, we were very open about everything from outset, I gather some couples hold back #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @gayadoptionuk: @Lawsey1974 The bad stories are getting fewer&fewer - good experiences r givin social workers confidence #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Lawsey1974 Can always call our helplines if you need advice: http://bit.ly/mFGCam #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@Lawsey1974 The bad stories are getting fewer and fewer - good experiences are giving social workers confidence #adoptfosterchat

steab84
#adoptfosterchat thank you, will pass the info on :)

BAAFAdoption
More in-depth info & advice in Pink Guide to Adoption: http://bit.ly/juV4M4 #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@Theresauno our foster carers were both great, very supportive, it was a worry going into it though #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@BAAFAdoption @Tillymint2u Fab! I love positive stories. heard some bad ones though, not sure why some have a tough time #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@steab84 It will differ from agency to agency, but q's would prob focus on how you are as a couple #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@steab84 hi, ours were asked, how we'd cope, experience with other kids, what families thought, how strong our relationship #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Lawsey1974: @lpnolan @BAAFAdoption Process took 13mths total. u go through it like everyone else.We were placed quickly #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@steab84 Personal refs confidential&applicants don't c them bt aim is 2 verify the self-reported info that applicants given #adoptfosterchat

ltwhit
Joining @ehayles to look at #adoptfosterchat

steab84
#adoptfosterchat hi, we are both starting the process. My question is about references, our friends who we have (cont) http://tl.gd/bdld9m

Lawsey1974
@lpnolan @BAAFAdoption BY that I mean the children were living with us by then #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@lpnolan @BAAFAdoption Process took us 13 months in total. You go through it like everyone else. We were placed quickly #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Tillymint2u: @BAAFAdoption hi, we've adopted our first and are in the process of adopting our second,all been positive #adoptfosterchat

steab84
#adoptfosterchat hi, we are both starting the process. My question is about references, our friends who we have (cont) http://tl.gd/bdlcqb

BAAFAdoption
@LauzTheGeek Both are a great way to start your adoption journey - both have same regulations & guidance #adoptfosterchat

Tillymint2u
@BAAFAdoption hi, we've adopted our first and are in the process of adopting our second, it's all been positive #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Lawsey1974 @BAAFAdoption Gr8 to hear it went so well for you. Can I ask, did u feel supported by the foster carers? T* #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
@Lawsey1974 That's good to hear - I have adopted one and hope to start again soon for another! #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Lawsey1974 Great to hear a positive story! #adoptfosterchat

Lawsey1974
@BAAFAdoption ok. We're two mums & have 2 adopted kids and we felt extremely well supported by LA. #adoptfosterchat Best thing we ever did

BAAFAdoption
Yup - chat, share experiences, ask Qs - but put #adoptfosterchat on your tweet :)

Lawsey1974
@BAAFAdoption @gayadoptionuk how does this work? do we just chat and put #adoptfosterchat after everything?

gayadoptionuk
Hello and welcome from us too... #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
Hi...... #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Hi all - welcome to the LGBT #adoptfosterchat! Our (slightly nervous) expert is here if you need him and we're also joined by @gayadoptionuk

learymay
RT @Theresauno: If u are interested, don't forget 2 join in @BAAFAdoption 7pm for GLBT adoption chat. add #adoptfosterchat to take part.

Theresauno
If u are interested, don't forget 2 join in @BAAFAdoption 7pm for GLBT adoption chat. add #adoptfosterchat to take part.

spikej77
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

Lawsey1974
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gismotigga
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

Katf25
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

LizzieMansfield
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

TACTCare
RT @BAAFAdoption: A reminder that you can follow #adoptfosterchat live here: http://bit.ly/h7qn9v Just over an hour to go!

TCblahblahblah
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

horsemusic
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

BAAFAdoption
A reminder that you can follow #adoptfosterchat live here: http://bit.ly/h7qn9v Just over an hour to go!

stonewalluk
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

learymay
RT @gayadoptionuk: @stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

GayTheatreNYC
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

di_erskine
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

brookgrahamltd
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gismotigga
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

lgfoundation
RT @gayadoptionuk: @lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gayadoptionuk
@AttitudeMag Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gayadoptionuk
@DIVAmagazine Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gayadoptionuk
@GayTimesMag Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gayadoptionuk
@lgfoundation Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

gayadoptionuk
@stonewalluk Please RT! LGBT #adoptfosterchat tonight at 7pm with us and @BAAFAdoption : http://cot.ag/lJfswE

BAAFAdoption
RT @aslongasittakes: Big shout out to @BAAFAdoption & @gayadoptionuk ahead of their #adoptfosterchat tonight http://t.co/UZSk2b3

gayadoptionuk
RT @aslongasittakes: Big shout out to @BAAFAdoption & @gayadoptionuk ahead of their #adoptfosterchat tonight http://t.co/UZSk2b3

aslongasittakes
Big shout out to @BAAFAdoption & @gayadoptionuk ahead of their #adoptfosterchat tonight http://t.co/UZSk2b3

Theresauno
@aslongasittakes Yr welcome. Hope to 'speak' 2 u 2night if u r joinin @BAAFAdoption #adoptfosterchat T*

henriettabond
RT @spursblogger: RT @BAAFAdoption: Only 4 hours til #gay and #lesbian #adoptfosterchat!

spursblogger
RT @BAAFAdoption: Only 4 hours til #gay and #lesbian #adoptfosterchat!

A_Bell_With_VL
RT @BAAFAdoption: Only 4 hours til #gay and #lesbian #adoptfosterchat!

BAAFAdoption
Only 4 hours til #gay and #lesbian #adoptfosterchat!

spursblogger
@BAAFAdoption you're welcome. Prob cant join you for #adoptfosterchat this eve. Hope it goes well

Theresauno
Thank-you for comment on blog @BAAFAdoption Looking forward to 'speaking' with u tonight. #adoptfosterchat T*

BAAFAdoption
We now have a live box thingy on our blog where u can watch tonight's live #adoptfosterchat! www.baaf.org.uk/blog - it's on the right!

BAAFAdoption
Morning tweeps! Looking forward to #adoptfosterchat tonight with @gayadoptionuk? http://bit.ly/kVmzBf

learymay
RT @gayadoptionuk: #adoptfosterchat tonight, 7-8pm, with us & @BAAFAdoption http://cot.ag/lJfswE #gay #adoption please RT /via Andy

danielfrench
RT @gayadoptionuk: #adoptfosterchat tonight, 7-8pm, with us & @BAAFAdoption http://cot.ag/lJfswE #gay #adoption please RT /via Andy

Theresauno
Join @BAAFAdoption tonight, 28th, 7-8pm #gay #lesbian adoption chat http://t.co/ZxmJmKK (my view http://t.co/3YVfLGO ) #adoptfosterchat

gayadoptionuk
#adoptfosterchat tonight, 7-8pm, with us & @BAAFAdoption http://cot.ag/lJfswE #gay #adoption please RT /via Andy

BAAFAdoption
RT @Lauzthegeek: Lookin 4ward to lesbian & gay #adoptfosterchat @BAAFAdoption. Currently writing my SW dissertation on it! Pls help if u can! @gayadoptionuk


For more info and advice about gay adoption, head to the BAAF website. Details about our Pink Guide to Adoption and real-life story Is it true you have two mums? can be found on the BAAF online bookstore.





Tuesday, 21 June 2011

The importance of pets in an adoption

Today on the blog we hear from Hazel, an adoptive mother who reflects back on meeting her son and daughter for the first time and explains why she feels pets play an important part adoption.

As we approach the 5th anniversary of our adopted son and daughter moving in with us, it feels like a good time to reflect on how far we’ve come as a family. When we first heard about them their names were not their real ones, to protect them, and all we had was a little photo and a few lines of text –apparently our son was into motor racing (at the age of 3!) and our daughter was into Disney princesses (at the age of 6 – aren’t they all!?); later a short video where our future daughter was clearly building up to a tantrum but quickly got cut off by the social worker filming her!

So, onto meeting the foster carer, eventually going to matching panel (one panel was cancelled due to incomplete paperwork – a complete nightmare) and finally onto introductions. One of the criteria my son had put for his new family was that we should have ‘a big cat’. Well, we don’t have any lions or tigers, but we do have two wonderful cats who really didn’t know what hit them when our son & daughter arrived that summer…! Our son was a tiny, angry whirlwind, all cats and people were in danger if they got in his way. Our fat (ish) ginger tom was used to a quiet life and spent the first 6 weeks in total shock & disbelief, whereas our sociable tabby (his brother) was delighted to have two new friends to play with and loved it from day one! The cats have just been the most amazing pets for our little ones to help them settle in.

It’s a little bit like Noah’s Ark here (not on a grand scale) but we have 2 adults, 2 children, 2 cats and now 2 guinea pigs – I relented after a few months of badgering from our daughter and yes I do most of the feeding and cleaning out but they are surprisingly good fun – we all know cats have amazing personalities (don’t we!?) but I never expected guinea pigs to as well! So, I write this whilst my children are asleep upstairs, now aged 11 and 8, I could never have imagined that I’d have a son and daughter who are the most amazing and beautiful children in the world (of course). There’s a cat on each of their beds, having helped them settle down for the night, helped them settle into our home and family and been the most wonderful pets a child could wish for. The guinea pigs rattle away in their cage next to me – I’m too soft to put them out in the cold so they are indoor pets too! For anyone thinking of getting a pet for a child I’d say just go & do it, they will give the child so much love and affection, there’s nothing like it.

For more heartwarming experiences of pets and adoption check out The Colours In Me, a collection of writings and poems by adopted children and young people.







Sunday, 19 June 2011

Father's Day Video: Every Child Deserves A Family

In the final edition of our special video series, proud adoptive dad (and camera pro) Phil shares an insight into his family life. Assuming you've already bought your Father's Day card, hit play below to watch Phil's story:


HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!


For info and advice about starting your adoption journey, visit the BAAF website. If you would like to sign up to become an Adoption Champion, please visit our National Adoption Week site.





Friday, 17 June 2011

Father's Day Video: Laughter and Tears in Adoption

So far in our Father's Day video series we've seen Shegun explain what being a father means to him, gay adoptive fathers David and Paul share their journey to becoming dads, and heard from James how adoption changed his life. Today we hand over to Nick, who speaks openly and honestly about his road to becoming an adoptive father to two young boys:



For more video content on adoption and fostering, head over to the BAAF YouTube channel.

If you have an adoption story to tell, contact press@baaf.org.uk - or sign up to become a BAAF Adoption Champion and help spread the word about adoption!





Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Father's Day Video: Adoption Changed My Life

In the latest video from our Father's Day series, stay at home dad James explains how adoption can be "challenging, frustrating, wonderful, liberating and rewarding" - and moreover, how it has changed his life forever. Click play below to hear the story in his own words:



New to our blog? You might want to check out Paul and David's gay adoption story and watch long-time BAAF champ Shegun explain what being an adoptive father means to him.

If you have an adoption story you'd like to tell, please get in touch via press@baaf.org.uk - or consider becoming an Adoption Champion for BAAF.

All of our adoption and fostering-related video content can be found on the BAAF YouTube channel.





Monday, 13 June 2011

Father's Day Video: Our Adoption Journey

Earlier this year Paul and David, adoptive parents to two boys, shared their story on the BAAF blog. In the run up to Father's Day, the couple told us what being a father means to each of them and how adoption has impacted their lives. Click play below to watch their story:



If you would like to discuss gay adoption, join us live on Twitter on Tuesday, June 28th between 7pm and 8pm. We will be joined by an expert from New Family Social as well as members of the gay adoption community. To take part in the chat, simply add #adoptfosterchat to your tweet.


BAAF has also recently published a book on lesbian adoption titled 'Is It True You Have Two Mums'.





Monday, 6 June 2011

Dads in adoption and fostering celebrated this Father's Day

We at BAAF think dads are really important to families, but sometimes their contribution can be overlooked. That's why, for Father's Day we try to provide opportunities for all those great fathers out there to get their voices heard. In previous years we've worked with journalists to run features in the media, run stories on our blog, and we even did a whole radio campaign dedicated to the issue. This year we want to pass the gauntlet to you.

We're asking all those dads out there to create a two minute video clip telling us why adoption/fostering is important to you, just like adoptive father Shegun has in the clip below. Please upload your videos to YouTube, tagging them with BAAFdads2011, then email a link to us. We'll share the best ones on our blog.

You don't have to be James Cameron or Steven Spielberg, or even have a video camera. Just use a mobile phone if that's all you have. What's important are your thoughts, beliefs and feelings.

That's the brief, here are a few rules...

  1. Whilst you may be tempted to include your children in your video, we would advise restricting it to just yourselves due to sensitivity and possible repercussions around showing adopted children
  2. Please keep to two minutes
  3. Please don't use music unless you own the rights to it
  4. Although we're not expecting the next Avatar we do need to be able to see and hear it properly to be able to appreciate your creations, so check it through before uploading it

That's all there is to it. Off you go! We look forward to sharing some of your short films around Father's Day.







Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Chat to us on Twitter about fostering

Last night we hosted our second #adoptfosterchat alongside Fostering Network focusing this time on fostering. If you were unable to join in the discussion live, read on below for a transcript of the chatter! Most recent tweets appear first.


trickykidzmum
RT @BAAFAdoption: Any foster carers in the house? #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
Bye everyone #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@BAAFAdoption @fosteringnet Goodnight and thanks again. T* #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@spursblogger Thanks Alan! #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
Thanks to @BAAFAdoption and @fosteringnet and everyone else on the chat #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@fosteringnet and thanks to those lovely people at the Fostering Network #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Goodnight all! #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger Thank you. I also know now that if caring for ch for longer than 12 mo can apply to Court for adoption order #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
Don't forget to look at my new blog n feel free to add/comment. Thanks T* http://tinyurl.com/3e67f7q #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@BAAFAdoption ta to BAAF for organising. have I done enough for the publications budget? #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
#adoptfosterchat thanks everyone - been great to chat to you all! We are over @fosteringnet or on Facebook at http://tiny.cc/y0me4

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles SSDs risk averse so scared. Shouldn't be that way but is. Commit to good diversity practice, will be fine #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Some conferences that may be of interest - http://bit.ly/mPR3rf and http://bit.ly/kY3hdN #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
And of course, our advice lines: http://bit.ly/mFGCam #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@BAAFAdoption Whilst fosterin n adoption r different processes there are also a lot of similarities. T* #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Thanks to everyone for joining in tonight - see our blog tomorrow for a full round-up http://bit.ly/h7qn9v #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles ask them for full reasons, as @Theresauno says, appeal. Church should not be prob if don't force it on child #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Theresauno They require separate assessments and are distinct processes #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@PottiJo because her faith makes her case "very complex" grrrr, so silly and very discriminatory #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@PottiJo My friend who is applying to adopt has been told outright that's why her case has been passed to a supervisor #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@Joanne_Coles Crikey that would be very discriminatory practice if it was linked to that! #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
@BAAFAdoption Thank you for all your answers. Lots to think about. #Adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Julesinshort You would need to talk through with the agency about which you are more interested in #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger I have an inkling it may be linked to my churchgoing ... although I certainly hope not! #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Joanne_Coles R u appealing against the decision? T* #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles don't understand that. It's no good reason. At all. #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
Can you foster and apply to adopt at the same time? #Adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Julesinshort if you have commitment, understanding of children you can foster. Parents don't make good carers necessarily #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Julesinshort Might be worth having a chat to Fosterline (0800 040 7675) about becoming a foster carer #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
"Child care experience" can be through extended family and friends #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
RT @BAAFAdoption: @Julesinshort You don't need to have been a parent, would probably benefit from experience in child care #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Fostering a child: http://bit.ly/kZMnsT #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@Theresauno We want to move so we have have more space for everyone! Haven't had official ltr yet, mtg was 6 weeks ago #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Julesinshort I've never had children Juliette...but I've fostered for about 16yrs now! Go for it! T* #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Mum2Rocky_Mally @Joanne_Coles such dogmatic narrow attitudes infuriate me. Carer is phenomenally valuable resource #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Julesinshort You don't need to have been a parent but would probably benefit from experience in child care #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Julesinshort You can be a foster carer if you don't have your own children - have a look at CYF http://tiny.cc/xu4lw #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Joanne_Coles @spursblogger My foster children movd wiv me! Have u had chance 2 explore every ave wiv S/W? #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
What if people have never had children. Does this make it too difficult to foster #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@Julesinshort In my personal view that wud b a brilliant choice n shud b advice for potetial adopters... @BAAFAdoption ?? #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@Joanne_Coles Crikey that would be very discriminatory practice if it was linked to that! #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
@BAAFAdoption Thank you for all your answers. Lots to think about. #Adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Julesinshort You would need to talk through with the agency about which you are more interested in #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger I have an inkling it may be linked to my churchgoing ... although I certainly hope not! #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@Joanne_Coles R u appealing against the decision? T* #adoptfosterchat

Paulcoxon81
RT @BAAFAdoption: "Child care experience" can be through extended family and friends #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles don't understand that. It's no good reason. At all. #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
Can you foster and apply to adopt at the same time? #Adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Julesinshort if you have commitment, understanding of children you can foster. Parents don't make good carers necessarily #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Julesinshort Might be worth having a chat to Fosterline (0800 040 7675) about becoming a foster carer #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
"Child care experience" can be through extended family and friends #adoptfosterchat

Paulcoxon81
RT @BAAFAdoption: RT @robertcgage: @BAAFAdoption Having just adopted,I think foster carers are superhuman.They were magnificent to our 2 boys

spursblogger
RT @BAAFAdoption: @Julesinshort You don't need to have been a parent, would probably benefit from experience in child care #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Theresauno: @Julesinshort I've never had children Juliette...but I've fostered for about 16yrs now! Go for it! T* #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Fostering a child: http://bit.ly/kZMnsT #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@Theresauno We want to move so we have have more space for everyone! Haven't had official ltr yet, mtg was 6 weeks ago #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@Julesinshort I've never had children Juliette...but I've fostered for about 16yrs now! Go for it! T* #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Mum2Rocky_Mally @Joanne_Coles such dogmatic narrow attitudes infuriate me. Carer is phenomenally valuable resource #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Julesinshort You don't need to have been a parent but would probably benefit from experience in child care #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Julesinshort You can be a foster carer if you don't have your own children - have a look at CYF http://tiny.cc/xu4lw #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@Joanne_Coles @spursblogger My foster children movd wiv me! Have u had chance 2 explore every ave wiv S/W? #adoptfosterchat

Julesinshort
What if people have never had children. Does this make it too difficult to foster #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger Apparently my home life isn't stable because I have my house up for sale??? #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@BAAFAdoption @robertcgage Wow that is really nice 2 hear. Thanks for sharin that wiv us FCs. T* #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@robertcgage Thanks for the feedback about your experience :) #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
RT @BAAFAdoption: RT @robertcgage: @BAAFAdoption Having just adopted,I think foster carers are superhuman.They were magnificent to our 2 boys

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles sorry to hear. Hope this was not because of prejudice against foster carers who adopt. needs of the child! #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @robertcgage: @BAAFAdoption Having just adopted,I think foster carers are superhuman.They were magnificent to our 2 boys #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Joanne_Coles @BAAFAdoption Glad to hear that we were able to help #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@theNAFP welcome to my friends at NAFP #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@Theresauno It's so hard sometimes #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@Joanne_Coles Sorry 2 hear that Joanne. I know how attached we can get 2 the children. T* #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Joanne_Coles Have you spoken to Fosterline? They might be able to advise (0800 040 7675 9-5 Mon-Fri) #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@BAAFAdoption Thank you, I spoke to someone lovely at Fostering Network the other day. Very very helpful! #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Theresauno There has been some great stuff up and down the UK for FCF - we have flagged some others at @fosteringnet #adoptfosterchat #fcf

BAAFAdoption
@Joanne_Coles FYI: advice lines here if needed http://bit.ly/mFGCam #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger I hope that happens! It needs to happen because it will have huge benefit to the children we care for #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles ..tell your SW this next time you feel left out! #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@theNAFP I think u r absolutey right...and I think fosterin has changed ova last twenty or so yrs too. T* #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles and treat carers as fellow profs. Wonder how long will take for culture to change but it's a great move. #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@Theresauno They can, yes, but I've recently been turned down to adopt the 19mo I've had since she was born :-( #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@Joanne_Coles is wrong, sadly experience of many carers. New Regs, Standards place duty on SSDs to make FCs part of team #adoptfosterchat

Mum2Rocky_Mally
@BAAFAdoption oops! #adoptfosterchat

theNAFP
#adoptfosterchat I don't think foster care is as well understood as adoption by most people and that's a problem for recruitment

Thersauno
@Joanne_Coles @BAAFAdoption As far as I no FCs can adopt in England as long as it is the best placement for the child. #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Joanne_Coles It's really great to get to chat to everyone! Hope you enjoy it #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@BAAFAdoption I definitely think we should aim to be more like the US so parents can foster and then adopt #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@spursblogger if you are interested in the recruitment of FCs, there is some good stuff at http://tiny.cc/3sq6e #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Mum2Rocky_Mally Remember to add #adoptfosterchat to your tweet to join the discussion :)

Thersauno
@Theresauno @BAAFAdoption Bt even if the motivation is different would adopters nt b better prepared experiencin it?..#adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Mum2Rocky_Mally: "I think that is a fab idea - I like that in USA most foster carers are foster to adopt :)" #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@spursblogger ... seem to be a real part of the team but rather a kind of babysitter #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
#adoptfosterchat ...longrunning, positive images, on TV, papers and web. Cares then approach local SSD or independent sector

Joanne_Coles
@BAAFAdoption The motivation is totally different, until you get that foster child you want to adopt! #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
#adoptfosterchat my Big Idea - ask DfE to run a national campaign for foster carers along same lines as TV ads for teachers cont

fosteringnet
If anyone is interested in becoming a FC, Could You Foster is a good place to start http://tiny.cc/01zm6 #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@BAAFAdoption ..comin in2 yr life thru training n 10days intros? #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Theresauno Usually the motivation from the adult is quite different for each #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@fosteringnet What a wonderful idea! I love it #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@BAAFAdoption What do u think about potential adopters trying out fostering first? Can u really eva b prepared for child ..#adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Joanne_Coles Hi! #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@Theresauno @BAAFAdoption Did you see this? The big freeze in Blackburn - http://tinyurl.com/3g5e6fr #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
On the topics of books... Foster care: some questions answered - http://bit.ly/m7cMnS #adoptfosterchat

Fosterbristol
RT @BAAFAdoption: Achieving permanence in foster care: http://bit.ly/mD7vNd #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Joanne_Coles Welcome! #adoptfosterchat

Joanne_Coles
@BAAFAdoption Hello all, coming in a little late #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@Theresauno That's a shame - did you see any local newspaper coverage? #adoptfosterchat

PottiJO
@BAAFAdoption @spursblogger Although I'm not on the fostering panel is useful info for me on the adoption panel methinks #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@PottiJo @spursblogger if you are members of the Fostering Network we have a RL on permanence http://tiny.cc/ntqvm #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@BAAFAdoption yes, I'm sure that's it. Available by post and from all good bookshops #adoptfosterchat

Paulcoxon81
RT @BAAFAdoption: Achieving permanence in foster care: http://bit.ly/mD7vNd #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@BAAFAdoption I didn't notice much advertisin myself bt I live mid nowhere. Howeva, local S.S had hi numba of inquiries. #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@BAAFAdoption @spursblogger I expect the fostering services locally have it I'll ask omorrow! LOL #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@PottiJo you might find it useful to talk this through with Fosterline on 0800 040 7675 (9-5 Mon-Fri) #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Achieving permanence in foster care: http://bit.ly/mD7vNd #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@spursblogger Yes I can see how tht would work. Maybe more difficult with children only fostered for brief periods #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@spursblogger Was this the one? http://bit.ly/mD7vNd #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@spursblogger @PottiJo For me respite is important 2 recharge batteries n give my best 2 the children. so I pay for it. #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@PottiJo errr... ! it's in the BAAF book about permanence I think Schofield is one author *he says vaguely* I'll check #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@PropertyHoliday 5 moves in 6mths because of holidays sounds possibly like really poor matchin? #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@PottiJo our carers get to know each other, training so c'ren do too. Informal and natural so easier to sort out a break #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@2Moms_and_baby However at a deep level I expect it will have impacted on her. xx #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
What did you all think of the recent #fostercarefortnight campaign? #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@Thersauno You sound like a lovely FC #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@spursblogger Thats v interesting. Can you point me to the research? #adoptfosterchat

2Moms_and_baby
@PottiJo #adoptfosterchat luckily this was all within first 6 months of her life! We brought her home at 6.5 monthsc

spursblogger
@PottiJo ..but research shows respite sustains difficult placements. Many SSDs won't accept respite in perm placements #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@2Moms_and_baby Thats very unsettling for a small person #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@spursblogger @PottiJo Agree Alan. I usually have once mth respite n kids enjoy goin as regular carers. #adoptfosterchat

PropertyHoliday
#adoptfosterchat it meant my Dd had 5 moves in 6 months cos fc went on holiday!: #adoptfosterchat it meant my Dd... bit.ly/kmfba3

PottiJo
@spursblogger Excellent suggestion! Might mention that at panel tomorrow! #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@PottiJo balance between needs of carers and c'ren. If respite disrupts placement, has to be no or not now #adoptfosterchat cont

2Moms_and_baby
#adoptfosterchat it meant my Dd had 5 moves in 6 months cos fc went on holiday!

Thersauno
@PottiJo Task centred, specialist. Short term?? My short temrs have usually been 18mths to 2yr #adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@Thersauno Agree with you there! That would be very unsettling again. #adoptfosterchat

spursblogger
@PottiJo solution is to have good links between careres the year round so children happy to stay with friends who they know #adoptfosterchat

2Moms_and_baby
#adoptfosterchat Ahhh I get it now lol

Theresauno
@PottiJo @fosteringnet @BAAFAdoption I really believe honesty is best policy.Wud nt expect FC 2 leave newly placd child. #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
@2Moms_and_baby add #adoptfosterchat to your tweet to join the conversation :)

PottiJo
@Thersauno Are you a long term foster carer or do they stay short term as I think that makes a difference #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
#adoptfosterchat Usual preference is for looked after children to go on holiday with their foster carer...

PottiJo
@Thersauno @fosteringnet @BAAFAdoption Sounds gd. What if it's children who have several moves? #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
I've always believed in bein totally honest wiv kids. So hols/respite mean a break and a rest from each other. #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
RT @Theresauno "Personally I think it is if handled correctly. I take kids abroad 2 wks n have 1 wk alone. T*" #adoptfosterchat

Theresauno
@PottiJo @fosteringnet @BAAFAdoption I think it is if handled correctly. I take kids abroad 2 wks n have 1 wk alone. T* #adoptfosterchat

Thersauno
@BAAFAdoption Hi.....Theresa here.....#adoptfosterchat

PottiJo
@fosteringnet @BAAFAdoption Is it acceptable for foster parents to go on holiday and put the children into respite? #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@spursblogger Hi Alan - glad that you could join us! #adoptfosterchat

fosteringnet
@BAAFAdoption Thanks! Looking forward to hearing from everyone! #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Any foster carers in the house? #adoptfosterchat

BAAFAdoption
Hiiii everyone! Welcome to the second #adoptfosterchat, hosted by yours truly and the lovely @fostering.net


For more information and advice, please head to the BAAF website for details about our helplines, conferences and online bookstore.





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