Monday, 14 November 2011

A poem by a foster child

(c) LadyDrgonflyCC
My foster child arrived during the summer holidays.She'd been sleeping rough for a week (in a local field) and when the police caught up with her, she was placed in their car, was driven to our house and was told she'd stay with us for the summer holidays. She had to leave her siblings and family behind and it's taken her a few months to settle in, get used to my husband and I and settle into a new school. (She decided she wanted to stay with us).

She's doing well all things considered. She's a very bright girl who doesn't really appreciate her full potential. When she's struggling with her feelings I ask her to write a poem about them. She's recently started doing this and has written a brilliant one that I feel should be shared for other kids and carers to read too.

A child all dirty comes into your home,

scared, frightened and feeling alone.

Wrapped in the system we call foster care,

at night they start missing that favourite teddy bear.

Please walk a mile in my shoes,

endure foster-parent dues.

Know how it feels to be judged by another,

because its said you're not the "real" mother.

If i'd known then, what I know today-

of the pain of fostering and the price I would pay-

Would I travel this road or say "Never, NO!"

If i'd known the trials years ago?

For we cannot go back, I cannot erase it,

What they've done to me, my mind cannot face it,

My heart's torn asunder, I can't save my parents from danger,

It's not in my power to stop or change them!

Do you know how it feels to not walk beside them?

to lose your place as their mentor and guider?

What is my role now? I'm really confused,

My self-esteem is battered and bruised.

What happened to us? I completely understand,

We all seemed attached years ago,

but my family's a shame.

I keep racking my brain with questions that taunt me.

WHY? WHY? WHY? continues to haunt me!

I'm hurt, angry, frustrated too,

I feel powerless, put-down, abandoned and blue,

at times I could give up- yes, wouldn't you?

But somehow I survive to fight anew!

I feel like i'm in a tug-of-war,

Without any rights to even the score,

tentatively trying to plan my attack,

to win a side, and repay them back!

How will I ever rebuild trust?

and heal the hurts if they're never discussed?

I've got to have time, counselling too!

To stay together and to work things through!

For more information about foster care, please visit the main BAAF website.

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